Cherish Your Marriage Every Day

What have you done today to put your marriage ahead of other priorities?

Cherish Your Marriage

Little things matter. They matter a lot. And doing little things for your marriage every day will make a huge difference in your relationship in the long run. Grand gestures are fun and exciting and I love doing them for my wife. But my marriage can’t survive on occasional grand gestures. I need to show her every day that I love her, that she matters to me, and that our marriage matters to me.

Living Distracted

It’s easy to get distracted and not pay much attention to your marriage. Life takes over, and soon the craziness steals our focus away from our most important earthly relationship: the one with our spouse.

You see, you only have one covenant relationship on this earth, and that is the one with your spouse. To me, that makes everything else optional.

Yes, of course, I realize you need to keep your job and take care of the kids, but the truth is that you don’t have a covenant with those things. Except for your relationship with Jesus, nothing else in your life should matter as much as your marriage.

Cherishing Us

My friends and fellow CMBA board members Tom and Debi Walter, who blog at The Romantic Vineyard, have just released a great new resource to help couples stay focused on their marriage relationship. It’s call Cherishing Us, 365 Tips for a Healthy Marriage.

What does it mean to cherish your marriage? Webster’s defines it this way:

  • to hold dear: feel or show affection for
  • to keep or cultivate with care and affection: nurture
  • to entertain or harbor in the mind deeply and resolutely

What I love about this book is that it’s bite-sized and practical. For each day there is a short phrase, no more than a sentence or two, that encourages you to consider something about your marriage. For digging a little deeper, there are monthly Contemplation Questions, Date Night suggestions, and additional thoughts on the importance of cherishing one another, many of which come from their insightful Romantic Vineyard posts.

Cherishing UsI hope you’ll get yourself a copy of Cherishing Us.  Available in Paperback or Kindle

 

A Fun Creative Valentine’s Day Idea

Infuse this Valentine’s Day celebration with a bit of creative fun!

Balloon Pop
It’s not too late to plan this super fun way to spend the day focused on building intimacy between you and your wife. (Of course, wives can use this idea too!)

What you’ll need for this romantic idea: a sheet of cardboard or piece of foam core board (part of a cut-open box works fine for this), a dozen balloons (I suggest red, white and pink, in keeping with the colors of the occasion), and a dozen of something that can fit inside a balloon (see below for lots of ideas).

A Dozen Intimate Somethings

What you put into the balloons is totally up to you, but you want them to be things that say “I love you” to your spouse.

It can be a dozen fun/romantic activities written on little notes, a dozen love-coupons, or even a dozen little gifts, or any combination of these. Of course most gifts won’t actually fit inside the balloon, so instead, put something small representing the gift, a clue to where the gift is hidden or even just a piece of paper with a picture of it – use your imagination. Imagination is the key! Another idea is to put “conversation hearts” into the balloon and let each prompt a conversation about why you chose that particular saying.

I found it fun to mix it up and include some fun activities (like going to a romantic movie or a walk), some little gifts (like a box of chocolate covered cherries – her favorite), a poem I wrote, and some romantic activities (like a massage for her).

Make the Balloon Board

Whatever dozen things you decide to use as part of this little game, you’ll need to figure out what can actually go inside the balloons. Stretch the mouth of the balloon open and push the item into the un-inflated balloon, then blow it up and tie off the balloon. Mount the balloons by cutting small x’s in the heart-shaped board around the heart pattern (pictured right) and pushing the stem of the balloon through. You can also use thumbtacks or push pins.

[Note: you don’t have to use a heart-shaped board or pattern, but it’s  a nice touch. If the thought of trying to draw a heart that isn’t lopsided will keep you from doing this, it’s fine to just use a square.]

You can also add your own flair to this by decorating the cardboard in some meaningful way: pictures, sayings, Vday decorations, wrap it in red foil or whatever. Again, use your imagination.

Start Poppin’

Present the board to your love along with a pin or something else sharp enough to pop the balloons. There are several fun ways of playing the game. The great part is that you get to make up the rules!

If you want the balloons to be popped in a certain sequence, number them with a permanent marker. If you want it to be a total surprise have her approach the board blindfolded and see if she can pop one. You can raise the suspense level and say she’s only allowed to pop one balloon per hour, stretching the game out all day long. When I did this for Jenni a few years ago, I let her choose which balloons to pop at random, but we stretched it out through much of the day.

The whole point of this game is to make your wife feel loved, cherish and adored in a way that builds connection and intimacy. Relax and have fun with it, but make sure she knows how much you care for her.

If you end up giving this one a try, I’d love to hear back from you how it goes!

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The Path of Intimacy is on 25% off sale until Valentines Day!

This little Kindle book might just transform your marriage. I can’t think of a better way to say “I love you” to your wife or husband this Valentine’s Day than to put your relationship on The Path of Intimacy. From now until February 14th you can get it for 25% off the regular price! Don’t wait!
POI Sale

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Romance 101

In keeping with the most romantic month of the year, later this month I’ll be starting up my Romance 101 club. It’s going to be a convenient and affordable way to keep romance alive 365 days a year by sending you monthly detailed date night ideas plus weekly romantic encouragement and real-world date night stories and tips from other couples. If you’d like a little more romance in your marriage but struggle to come up with good ideas, this service is for you. You can read more about it here.

 

The origin of this post is one I wrote in January 2012 for my Journey to Surrender blog.